


Take Me Back To When I First Fell In Love With You

by saawinchester



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Awesome Sam, Awesome Sam Winchester, Bottom Castiel, Closeted Dean, Crying Castiel, Dean in Denial, Destiel endgame, F/M, Flashbacks, Guilty Dean, Heartbreak, Homophobic Language, Human Castiel, Hunter Dean Winchester, Hurt Castiel, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Protective Castiel, Protective Dean, Protective Sam, S9 Dean, Sad Castiel, Scared Dean Winchester, Top Dean
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-30
Updated: 2018-07-26
Packaged: 2019-04-30 00:04:06
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 17,849
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14484168
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/saawinchester/pseuds/saawinchester
Summary: Castiel loves Dean. It’s much more than just a profound bond. One day a very much human Castiel decides to accompany Charlie, Dean and Sam on a much needed night out, in the process getting drunk.Through the power of liquid confidence, Castiel confesses his love for Dean in front of the group. He is too drunk to notice Dean fix him a confused and disturbed look.The next morning, Castiel wakes up with a nasty hangover. Than as if his mind was trying to torture him, flashbacks of their night at the bar came back to haunt him. His confession to the righteous man and closest friend was running on replay. Suddenly he felt terrified. Will Dean remember? How will Dean react?Castiel finds out his answer when the hunter starts to avoid eye contact with him. When the hunter maintains a distance from him. When the hunter tells him off after he confronts him. He feels all is lost and all is broken. Is everything as it seems?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I do not own anyone in this fic. Just borrowing names and faces for fan fic purposes only.
> 
> This is S9 gruff looking Dean and S9 Human Castiel.

Dean and Sam were already dressed for their outing. Dean in his dark blue denims and a black Metallica t-shirt with biker boots while Sam had on his blue checkered button up with light blue denims and black biker boots. Now all they were waiting for were Charlie and Castiel who were still occupying the angels room. Apparently Charlie wanted to dress Castiel up proper for a night out.

After a few minutes of waiting Charlie than entered the map room, she was wearing a black body hugging polka dot dress that looked awesome on her. She clapped excitedly.

“Wait till you guys see him. He is totally Mr. Dreamy”, she gushed out.  She stepped to Sam’s side, facing the map room entrance, “Ok Cas you can come out now”. 

Deans heart sped up when his eyes landed on Castiel. He wanted to gawp but held his mouth well. The angel before him was breathtaking.

The black denims hugged the mans thighs and pert ass well while the navy blue and black checkered flannel accentuated the angels fit lean body. To also add to Castiels beauty was the mans ruffled jet black hair that went well with his cerulean blue eyes and light pink lips. _Shit he was staring._ He cleared his throat, “Wow! I must say you look good Cas”. He winked, “All the ladies are going to be definitely checking you out”.

Sam gave Dean an amused look before he faced Castiel, “I agree with Dean Cas.  Definitely different from the trench coat look. It suits you”.

“Oh um- thank you Dean and Sam”, Castiel flushed lightly. He was feeling self-conscious because of Dean and Sam's observant look. Dean particularly made his heart flutter.

Charlie clapped, “Ok shall we go my lovelies?”

Dean chuckled, “Hell yeah”.

Dean had gotten them a cab to take them to the bar since they were all into the mood of getting smashed tonight which equals _no driving baby._

* * *

  **Raffles Bar**

The bar was filled with lovely ladies in short mini dresses, workers after a shift, couples, patrons. _It was a Friday after all._ They were lucky to find themselves a table, situating themselves around it. They had started off with a few beers than the shots started rolling in. 

After an hour, Castiel started to feel tipsy. Everything seemed happy around him. He loved the feeling. He heard Dean, who was situated on his right , whispering into his ear, “Hey lightweight. You ok?”

Castiel felt the warm breath against his ear making him feel flushed. Castiel turned his head slightly, smiling at the hunter, quietly replying,  “I feel a little effect but overall I’m good thanks”. 

“Ok Cas. Just let me know if ya had enough than we can head back ok?” 

Castiel could hear the concern and care  in Deans voice and that only made his heart pound harder while there was this feeling of something flying around in his tummy. It also felt good to have the hunter so close to his side, feeling the warm heat of the mans body.

 After another hour and more shots and beers, things started to get fuzzy and Castiel was just laughing away at whatever Dean, Charlie or Sam uttered. He thought he heard an indistinct _‘I think Cas is drunk guys’_ from his side but didn’t really care.

He than felt a hand on his bicep, he turned to see it was Dean. The man looked so handsome right now. He chuckled and let his eyes roam Deans face.

Christ the feeling of Castiels muscular firm bicep had Dean wondering about the strength of the man before him. _And oh he knew how powerful the angel was._ He was feeling a very pleasurable tingling sensation that branched out from his half hard cock. He gulped as feelings he thought he hid well slowly came back to life. Maybe it was the alcohol? 

_Or maybe not Dean._

_No Dean get yourself together._ He cleared his throat, “Hey Cas you wanna head back? You’re  looking kinda drunk buddy”. Dean chuckled.

Up close Deans freckles made the man look beautiful. _Angel kisses_. Castiel giggled, his mouth felt loose, “I have something to tell you Dean. Do ya- do ya wanna hear it?”.

Dean glanced at Sam and Charlie who just shrugged. He answered, “Yes Cas what is it?”

“I….I have been so madly in love with you ever since I rescued your soul from hell. Sometimes I want to kiss you and do things that grown up people do. Sex I believe is the word. I- I wanna have sex with you- you Dean Winchester. I-I want to be -your partner sexually, emotionally, phy-physically. Only me-me and you to-together for-forever. I l-love you Dean”, Castiel let fall out.

Deans touch immediately disappeared and a terrified detached look appeared. He cleared his throat, “Um Sammy I gotta drain the lizard. How about you find us a cab ? Be there in a sec”.

All Castiel remembers is Sam and Charlie’s concerned voice as they helped him on his jelly legs to a taxi. As soon as his head hit the leather seat, he passed out. Not remembering who brought him to his bed, pulled his boots off and covered him. 

* * *

Castiel slowly woke up groaning at the construction work going on in his head and the taste of something dying in his mouth. _Uh he needed to freshen up._ He thumbed at his forehead and turned his head to the side seeing a glass of water and asprin there on the nightstand. He slowly got up and swallowed the pill with water. _God he wished he had his angel mojo to wipe out his terrible hangover._

He just sat there for some time trying to remember his activities last night. He sure as hell was too drunk that he couldn’t even walk steady. _God Dean was right, he was a lightweight_. Then as if a freight train had hit him, all that he had said to Dean came slamming into his mind. His stomach churned as this unpleasant sensation climbed up his chest into his throat than before he knows it, he is running into his bathroom and puking into the toilet bowl. 

He leaned his forehead on his forearm that gripped the toilet. _Oh God what has he done?_ He has kept his secret so long within him and just due to an uncontrolled drunk night out he confessed. _What will Dean be thinking right now? Will Dean remember?_ He hoped that Dean would forget or chuck it off to drunk talking. However, there was also a part of him that felt slightly satisfied that Dean knew and also hopeful that maybe Dean will reciprocate his feelings. He hoped all would go well.

* * *

Dean was making breakfast. After Castiels confession last night all that he could do was replay the words in his head. When Castiel had uttered the words ‘ _I love you’,_ his heart had done a happy somersault but at the same time, he was shocked. 

Castiel had also confessed his feelings in front of Sam and Charlie which kind of made him feel uneasy. So he did what he always does when faced with obstacles he couldn't handle, _he ran._

Now he has almost always been on the straight and narrow in terms of his sexuality. _Almost_. He had been there, done that. _Well not completely all that._ He was a curious kid at 16 years old and chucked it off to a short phase in his life. He never attempted to be with a man or spoke of it again.

His father John Winchester was a firm believer that homosexuality was a sin and disgusting. He drilled this into Sam and Dean whenever he saw a homosexual couple. He always warned them that if they ever took that path than he would beat the gay out of them both. So Dean had grown up long on the firm beliefs of his father. He had sex with only women and enjoyed it. He never found any men attractive or appealing again. That was until the night he first met the angel in the abandoned barn.  

Dean wasn’t blind, Castiel was a very handsome man.  The only man that Dean secretly found could get him hard and wanting with just one look of his baby blues. He hated when that happened hence he kept Castiel at a distance. _Personal space Cas._

But truth is he is afraid. He has suppressed this urge for many years but after Castiels drunk confession, he can’t stop his filthy thoughts about the angel. So he needs to just get himself together and prove that he likes women. Lots of women.

_Yeah keep telling yourself that Dean._

Just than Castiel dragged his feet into the kitchen. The man looked fresh but at the same time dead. _Probably the hangover_. Castiel spotted Dean glancing at him. He replied carefully, nodding, “Good morning Dean”.

Dean glanced down at the frying pan as he turned the bacon. Without looking up he replied, “ morning Cas”.

He could tell Castiels eyes followed him. He was feeling tense and cornered now. He poured the coffee into two mugs. He placed the mug in front of Castiel, “Drink... you will feel better”.

Castiel eyes the man before him. There was palpable tension he sensed between Dean and he. He felt he needed to speak his mind, “Dean do you remember a few things I said last night?”

Deans eyes snapped up to his with a defensive cold look that was enough to make Castiel want a hole to appear at the bottom of his feet and swallow him. Dean replied rather firm,“Yeah I remember a lot of things. We had good laughs”. He ignored the part about Castiels confession.

“And what about…..the feelings I said I had for you?”

Dean shrugged, “That was just drunk talking Cas”. 

“Studies have shown that drunk people always say what they truly feel in their hearts and minds”, Castiel added smartly.

Dean scoffed, taking a seat opposite Cas. He swallowed his coffee before digging his fork into his bacon, “Eat Cas”.

“Dean I meant what I said”.

Dean sighed tiredly and pinched the bridge of his nose, feeling a headache coming, “Cas let’s not talk about last night. I am hungry and I want to finish my breakfast without any disturbances”.

“Dean I’m sorry that I have upset you”, Castiel said with a heavy heart, he was trying to control his tears. Before his confession, he swore than there were small sparks between Dean and he, so he pushed. “Dean I also felt that you have feelings for me”, he added persistently.

“What?” Dean belted out sharply in disbelief. He than got up and threw his dishes into the sink,” For the last time, I am not gay Castiel. I love women. Sure if that’s your thing than fine but don’t you drag me into this”.

“Dean please-“

Dean turned around and yelled, “Enough!.....Just enough Castiel!... What is wrong with you huh?..... I won’t ever return your feelings like that….. I will never like you that way. …..We are just friends Cas……Get over it! ” With that Dean stormed out of the kitchen.

Castiel let his tears slip down his face. His heart had never been torn up so bad. His hands trembled and shook. This was the harsh reality he needed to face. Dean didn’t want to be with him the way he wanted to be with Dean. He had been reading the signs wrong. 

With a heavy heart he chose never to speak of what happened last night, ever again. Like every little feeling he had for Dean that was more than friendly; he shoved it away, locked inside his heart for eternity.

TBC

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More angst....I'm sorry :(
> 
> Warning: Homophobic references. ..

_It was 7pm and tension was thick in the air._ Well that’s what Sam's current observations led him to believe. _This was not good._ His brother locked himself in his bedroom for practically the whole day while Castiel seemed to be holed up in his. _What was going on?_

_You know what is going on Sam._

He knew that the voice inside him was referring to the angels drunken confession last night.  What made him a little certain was the scene he had run into this morning.

**Earlier...**

_Sam was walking towards the kitchen when he heard some raised voices coming from the same direction. He furrowed his brows eager to see what the commotion was about. Just as he was turning down the corridor , a hard body almost slammed into his, “Woah!” Sam dodged._

_All Dean did was grunt and keep on stomping ahead. Sam watched the rigid posture of his brother as he walked away._ Dean was angry.

 _He slowly made his way into the kitchen. He was met with the sight of a downcast looking Castiel seating by the kitchen island._ Why was the angel upset? _He cleared his throat to announce his presence, “Good morning Cas”._

_Castiels head shot up to glance at Sam. He replied rather bashfully, avoiding eye contact, “Good morning Sam”._

_Sam smiled and walked towards the coffee machine, reaching for the glass kettle and pouring himself a cuppa. “So um-…just met Dean. Damn jerk almost ran me over. He looked pretty pissed. Anything happen?” He turned to face….no one._ Shit Cas has some ninja skills even without mojo.

**Present....**

Yup probably something to do with last night now that Sam thought of it. If you ask him, how he felt about Castiels confession than he would say _Its about goddamn time!_ The angel and hunter pretending to be just platonic was driving him up the damn wall. _I mean how many damn times can two people engage in eye sex?_ And don’t get him started on Deans ‘ _Personal Space’_ rule. 

Sam has witnessed conversations that carried fondness, arguments that carried worry, hugs that provided comfort between the pair. Their ‘ _profound bond_ ’ was turning to one of a romantic one right under their noses. There was only one problem though. _Dean_.

His brother was an all-time no fail ladies man. 

He knew that deep down, Dean was putting up a façade. To Sam, he could read his brother like an open book. Dean is straight but at the same time he is Cas-sexual. The man is just deep in the closet. Their father had definitely done a number on he and Dean…. _well especially Dean._

He was startled from his thoughts when Dean spoke, “Hey Sam, I’m going out”.

Sam spotted a very handsomely dressed Dean. Well he was in a nice black button down with sleeves rolled to his elbows, dark blue denims and his black low heel ankle boots. He noticed his brothers well trimmed beard, dashingly combed hair and the smell of his cologne. _Dean was dressed for hunting._ And not supernatural hunting, more like woman hunting. _Oh this is not good_. He asked, “Out where?”

Dean gave him a quizzical look, “Out to a club Sam”. He than smirked, “Remember Natasha from the bar yesterday?”

 _How could Sam forget?_ She was the annoying chick that Dean had been flirting with at their table. He was pretty sure that that was the reason Castiel decided to chug down shot after shot, getting himself wasted fast. He couldn’t believe his brother was actually going to go out with the woman. He crossed his arms across his chest, “Dean maybe you should just stay home today. We just went out yesterday”.

Dean shot him a glare, “So?! I am old enough to do what I want Sam! And that means going out with a hot chick that..... who knows could become something more!”

Sam couldn’t believe what he was hearing, “What do you mean _‘become something more’_ Dean? You’re not planning on making her your girlfriend are you?”

“I don’t know Sam. It’s means I like her, so drop it!” Dean slipped his jacket on.

They were both startled when Castiel spoke, voice sounding thick, “You’re heading out Dean?”

Sam watched as Deans posture became stiff, without looking at Cas he replied with tightness, “Yes. I am going out for Christ sakes Cas! With Natasha”. He aimed Castiel a dark look, “You got a fucken problem with that?!”

“Dean!” Sam scolded.

Castiel than placed a hand on Sams bicep. Sam glanced at Castiel and the sight before him broke his heart. 

Castiel shakily smiled, but he had on this doleful look. His voice was toneless when he answered, “I’m sorry for being so inquisitive Dean. Of course you are free to do as you please. Have a nice night out with Natasha”. He added, “Excuse me Sam, Dean, I’m going to go lie down now as I am not feeling very well”. With that Sam watched Castiel walk away.

Sam could sense the angel was hurt by Deans rudeness and revelation but had tried to keep himself together. Sam shot his now slightly guilty looking brother a scowl. _God he could kick the man’s ass_. He blurted, “ What the hell was that Dean? Why do you have to be a major jerk huh?”

Dean sighed, “Sam its none of you or Castiels business if I am going out with a girl tonight”.

“Is this about last night? About Castiel confessing to you how much he loves you?”

Dean slammed his fist on the table, “damnit I am not a fucken queer Sam! Drop it! The guy was blind drunk, saying ridiculous shit he didn’t mean!”

“And what if he meant it Dean?! Huh? What would you do? Would you return his feelings too!” Sam bit back.

Dean growled, picking up his keys, “I don’t need to listen to this shit anymore!” He headed towards the map room that lead to the stairs. As he strode up the stairs he blurted over his shoulder, “Don’t wait up!”

Sam watched as his brother slammed the main door behind him. He suddenly felt sad. Dean was probably going to make a hurtful decision that would impact the angel and he. _This was not good at all._

* * *

Castiel felt something wet run down his cheeks. He slowly wiped a finger  across the liquid bringing it to his vision seeing a colorless liquid much like water on the pad of his thumb. He knew what this was. _Tears_. 

This heavy feeling settled in his chest. His heart felt like it was squeezing and his stomach was convulsing unpleasantly. He was trembling uncontrollably as he sat on his bed. His lips wobbled and before he knows it he lets out a choked sound and more tears start pouring out. He clutches his pillow to his chest and starts to cry. _For the second time today Castiel lets it flow._

He lies down on his side, staring blankly at the wall before him. All that runs through his mind is _Dean doesn’t love me anymore. Dean never loved me. I don’t deserve Dean. He deserves someone good, someone like Natasha. I will die forever lonely as is the path chosen for me. I will help the Winchesters whenever I can and wish them good fortune. Wish Dean good fortune._

Castiel falls asleep with tears running down his cheeks.

* * *

_"What if he meant it Dean? Would you return his feelings too?"_

Damnit Sammy!

Dean white knuckled the steering wheel. His vision was slightly blurred as he drove. He felt a tear run down his cheek. His heart ached. The sadness, the hopelessness in Castiels face and voice shook him to the core. 

The feeling of guilt, self loathing, and heartbreak started to makes it way throughout him. _He let his anger get the better of him_. Feelings for the angel were starting to re-surface.

 But he couldn’t have that. No his father would be disappointed if he were alive. _Get yourself together Dean._

He pulled up in front of the club. There was Natasha in a very tight black dress that was short enough to nearly show the globes of her ass and v neck low enough to show her wonderful rack. He felt a stirring in his cock. _Yes he definitely liked women._

* * *

Sam was still awake at 3.30am when his brother came back. _And he was not alone._ Dean had a clingy Natasha hanging off him and they were both drunk.

Sams blood pressure rose.

“Dean what’s this?” Sam gestured.

Dean wrapped an arm around Natasha’s shoulder. Dean smirked, “Sam meet Natasha”. He turned to the brunette, “Natasha baby meet Sam my brother”.

“It’s nice to meet you Sam”, the beautiful brunette said before she whispered something in Deans ear making his brother blush.

Dean didn’t wait for Sam to say more. He just saluted, “Good night Sammy”. With that Dean led Natasha to his bedroom.

Sam swallowed. _God he hoped his brother knew what he was getting himself into_.

* * *

Castiel wanted to grab a drink of water. His throat was dry and scratchy due to all the crying he had done earlier. He needed to rehydrate as well.

As he made his way closer to Deans room, he could hear soft sounds. His heart started to palpitate. As he neared, the sounds became clear. It was Dean and a woman moaning while sexually satisfying each other. His heart plummeted to his tummy, his vision once more getting cloudy.

 He willed himself to keep moving ahead as the moans, grunts and creaking of the bed got louder while the couple chased their climax. 

Castiel knew this was it. He would continue to be the perfect soldier for the Winchesters. But only the perfect soldier until death take him. For that is all he is good for.

_Wish you good fortune Dean._

TBC

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Thoughts?
> 
> Feedback...
> 
> Comments and kudos....xoxo!


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the lateness in chapter....apologies ♡
> 
> Sam gives Dean his piece of mind and a little nudge....

It was around 3pm when Dean woke up. He trudged to the kitchen. He headed straight for the pot of hot coffee pouring and taking one hugh gulp emptying the mug one go. He could feel the effects of caffeine start to clear his fog addled mind. He filled himself another cup and turned only to jump slightly at the sight of his brother quietly studying him from the island.

“Damnit Sam! Christ nearly gave me a damn heart attack”, Dean clasped at his chest.

Sam huffed out an annoyed sound, biting out, “Sorry to startle you Dean”.

Dean raised an amused brow at his brothers bitchface and grumbly tone. He teased, “Oh what happened Sammy? Woke up on the wrong side of the bed”.

“Funny you should say that Dean because yeah Cas and I couldn’t get some shut eye due to the fact that you and your….company were practically yelling out like two bitches in heat”.

Dean choked slightly on his coffee. _Christ this was embarrassing._ He aimed a shamefaced look at Sam, “Sorry bro. Natasha and I-“

“Were highly inebriated”.

Dean gawped at the venom in his brothers voice. He swallowed, rubbing the back of his neck, quietly uttering, “Um yeah sorry”. Than a thought came into his mind, “Wait have you seen Natasha?  I woke up and she wasn’t around. Assumed she’d be in the kitchen. Maybe should give her a ride back”.

Sam folded his arms along his chest, gritting out, “Yes I have seen her Dean. She woke up late for work and had to rush. Obviously she didn’t have any transport. I suggested she go wake you up because she was your problem to take care of. But our good hearted angel friend who would put his life on the line for us said that he would drive her back as he didn’t want your sleep to be disturbed. He said and I quote, _Deans needs his sleep as it is good for his health”._

Deans stomach churned as a pit started to form in it. His heart squeezed at Sam’s words. _The angel had gone out of his way for him….again._ He felt like utter shit right now. He stammered, “Sam I-“

Sam slammed his palm down on the island top, “Enough Dean! I am tired of your screw ups and shit! How can you do something so hurtful Dean? Now the one you wanted to prove your HETEROSEXUALITY to is the one hurt but still takes care of YOUR mess. Why? Because he LOVES you!” He stood up, glaring, “ I will ask you this question only once. What do you want Dean?!”

Dean had never seen his brother so pissed before and damn if his words didn’t smack him straight in his face. He was currently speechless and didn’t know what to even say.  He thought back to all his actions this past week, of Cas smile, eyes ……words in the bar. _It still frightened him some_. He swallowed, glancing at his fiddling fingers on the island top, murmuring, “I don’t know Sam”.

Sams heart ached for his brother. He could see the worried, frightened and confused look Dean had on. He wished he could decide for his brother but he knew that this was a step Dean needed to take on his own. _Didn't mean he couldn’t give a little nudge._ His anger simmered down, sitting back down, he softly added, “Dean please look at me”.

Dean glanced up at his brother, he saw the genuine sad but determined expression etched on Sams face. He knew his brother was only concerned for him. 

Sam saw how tired Dean looked. Than man really tried hard to stay in the friend zone with Cas. _Too hard_. His brother was lying to himself. And if he doesn’t stop than things will only get worse for both Dean and Cas. _Well not if he can do anything about it_. First he has to break the barrier surrounding Dean Winchester. He carefully added, “Dean I love you and I want to see you happy. I want you to think carefully about what I am going to say. And let me finish ok?”

Dean swallowed and nodded,  “What is it Sam?”

“You know when Dad used to scold us, lectured us…..beat you up just because you were flirting lightly with a boy. Harmless……Well he was an asshole who was also a  narrow minded prick. Dean he is also gone….dead”. Sam sighed, “I know how dad’s rules are important to you but Dean.... will you really let him control your life? Because if you do than you will be a very unhappy man. Sure you will have the occasional fling but is it even worth it?”

“Sam there is no happy in our lives. We are hunters and we may die tomorrow”.

“Dean….even in this life we can find happiness. It’s whether you choose to give it a chance or not”. He sat up straight and asked, “Dean answer me this……….you say we may die tomorrow so would you rather die with no regrets? Would you rather say at least I had spent time with you? Would you rather have said I love you too? Would you have rather lived for you and not for anyone else?” 

Deans heart thumps harder against his ribcage at the same time his stomach churns, “Sam I do want that but-“

Sam shook his head, “This is not a time for buts Dean. It’s either do or don’t. Now you know that I will always be here for you. You are my brother and the most important person to me right now. So it’s time to choose Dean. Do you deserve happiness for all the good you have done or will you die a bitter man taking your love you have for Castiel to your grave”.

“Hey I like the angel not love Sam”, Dean corrected without much heat in his voice.

Sam smiled, “ Dean anybody with two eyes that has the opportunity to watch you and Castiel for even a short while will say _yup those two are in love_ …..it’s a pity because one will admit it while the other is too scared to”.

Deans heart fluttered at that. _What was he going to do?_ He knew what he wanted and was damn terrified. Maybe there was a part of him that wanted to at least try. _Ok well a big ass part if him now wanted to._ However, he had kinda dug himself into a pit. And that thought alone increased his heart rate and fear. He shakily added, “Sam I already screwed things up. I have broken the heart of one whom I lo-....I have rejected him and shoved cruelty into his face. He will never forgive me. Heh! Probably hates my damn guts. I would hate my own guts”.

Sam sighs tiredly, “Dean Cas can never hate your guts man. Yes he will probably give you a good telling off and even the cold shoulder, _which he has every right to do,_ but he will never ever hate you Dean. If you are serious about trying to make things work than I suggest you take the first step. The ball is in your court Dean. Either take the shot or go back to whatever it is you have”. Sam got up and gave his brother a pat on the back, walking away and saying over his shoulder, “You can fix this Dean”.

Dean sat there pondering all Sam had said. His hangover completely gone and a new feeling starting to emerge. _Hope_. 

 _Maybe he needed Cas. Maybe it was time to go back to that moment in the barn where he first glanced into those baby blues and instantly fell hard_. 

* * *

Castiel had had enough of Natasha yammering on about _Dean this, Dean that._ When she got off and stuck her head through the window holding out a piece of paper telling him to give it to Dean, all he did was smile and eloquently told her that Dean was just using her to get his rocks off and that she is probably already history. _She was not very happy about that._

What he was just telling the truth right?

All the pain came rushing back when on the road driving back to the bunker. _He didn’t know how he would look at Dean now?_ Maybe he will just stare at whatever is behind Dean. One thing was for certain…..Dean had every right to be with whomever he felt comfortable with.

It didn’t mean that he was strong enough to fight the urge to cry. Just like now as tears cascaded down his cheeks. _It seems to be a common occurrence now_. All this heavy feelings in his chest,  curling sensation in his tummy, trembling ……among other things reminded him of how upset he was. _Being human sucked._

He didn’t know what to expect when he got back to the bunker. He was going to stay strong and pretend that he was fine. However, the dark circles puffy eyes would say otherwise. He just wanted Dean to be  happy. _And if that meant keeping his feelings for the man at bay than so be it._

He parked in front of the bunker. He took a deep breath getting out of the car and heading towards the entrance. As he climbed down the stairs, he could feel someone’s eyes on him. He walked through the war room, past the library heading towards the kitchen but stopped dead in his tracks when he came face to face with Dean leaning against the kitchen door staring at him with a downturned expression.

His heart started to race as he felt tears automatically fill up his eyes. _Shit keep it together Cas_. He stammered, “De-Dean….you scared me…..is there something I can help you with?”

Dean cleared his throat, and hesitantly took a few steps forward till he was standing a foot away from Castiel. He saw the angel fidget slightly at their closeness, staring down at the floor. He hooked two fingers under Castiels chin, lifting the man’s face up till green met blue. _Now that they were standing so close, he could get lost in those blues_. He cleared his throat and spoke in a watery voice, “Cas can we talk?”

Castiel wanted to stare into Deans eyes forever. There was this fluttering in his belly and tingling sensation under his chin where Deans fingers currently were. He frowned slightly at the man’s question and than this feeling of dread started to fill him up. _Oh God what if Dean wanted him gone._ He willed himself to stay strong. He would do whatever the righteous man wanted of him. He swallowed and courageously replied, “Yes Dean we can talk”.

TBC

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Thoughts?
> 
>  
> 
> Feedback...
> 
> Comments and kudos....xoxo!


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean and Castiel talk...

Dean studied Castiels apprehensive look. _He couldn’t blame the angel_. As a matter of fact he was feeling the same way too. He took a step back, trying to give them some room to breathe. Dean cleared his throat, “Um…I think we should have this conversation sitting down Cas?”

Castiel dreaded what the conversation would entail. Nevertheless, he swallowed the lump in his throat before replying, “O-Ok Dean. Lets”.

Dean led them to the leather sofa located near the library corner. Once seated, silence overtook them. Deans hands felt clammy. He swallowed down a gulp and said, “Cas I wanted to talk to you about…”. Dean waved his hand in the air, “You know”.

Castiel furrowed his brow, “I don’t understand what _you know_ is Dean?”

Dean feigned a cough, “About what happened in the bar. Your confession regarding your feelings for me….And…um other stuff that happened the days that followed”.

Castiel glanced down at his fiddling fingers on his lap, unable to bring himself to meet Deans eyes as he replied, “Oh. Ok”. He added softly, “We don’t have to talk about that Dean if you don’t want-“.

“Did you mean it? Did you mean when you said that you loved me…more than….you know….brotherly?”

Castiel nodded, muttering, “Yes Dean I meant it. Sorry though for making you feel uncomfortable. I was in a situation whereby I couldn't control my mouth. I was intoxicated”.

Dean chuckled lightly at the angels bluntness, “Yeah that happens to the best of us Cas”. He blew out a breath, closing his eyes for a second before he said, “I….um….I was caught off guard and I’m sorry for acting in such a…..negative way…..In fact I've been acting like a major dick and treating you like crap this last couple of days…I’m deeply sorry Cas”.

Castiels wide eyes immediately meeting Deans sympathetic ones, stuttering, “De-Dean please do not apologize. I was way out of line. You had every right to react the way that you did”. He shrugged, “I should have kept my mouth shut”.

Deans heart squeezed at the downcast painful expression Castiel displayed when saying the last sentence. He uttered, “Cas….you have every right to express your feelings…Everyone does….It’s really up to the person how they choose to take the information received”. He huffed, “I could have acted less brash”.

Castiel shook his head, “Please Dean. I am at fault here. I don’t know what I was thinking. I am an angel. We celestial beings are put here to serve. Nothing more or nothing less. I am here to serve you and Sam. Do whatever it is the Winchesters command until death claim me. We are soldiers Dean. We do not deserve love”.

Dean gawped in disbelief at Castiels words. _How Castiel can just say that he doesn’t deserve love?_ He knew he was partially to blame for Castiels outlook. Without thinking he laid his hand atop Castiels bouncing knee, halting the man’s movement. He uttered low, “Castiel everyone deserves love in their life, otherwise they can become bitter. Angels also deserve love Cas. And as for the _only here to serve till you die part_ …..well…..let me tell you that you angels give yourselves less credit than you're worth...you are spectacular, amazing, loving beings that deserve immense respect from any human you are linked with…well some of you angels since many are just dicks......anyway Sam and I owe you so much Cas….you’re not expendable”.

Castiels heart fluttered at Deans words, “What does that mean Dean?”

“It means that you are hella important to Sam and I…..particularly I”.

Castiels eyes roamed Deans curiously, repeating, “Particularly you?”

Dean nodded, heart thumping loudly, squeezing Castiels upper knee lightly, “Cas I have something to confess….something I have held deeply inside of me…..since the first time I ever met you back in the barn all those years back”.

“You mean the first time you stabbed me?”

Dean scoffed playfully, “In my defense, I had no idea what you were, demons were afraid of you, you were the thing that burned Pamela’s eyes out, scared the crap out of me and had no fashion sense with your tax accountant suit”. He rubbed the back of his neck, flushing lightly as he said, “A suit that I have grown very fond of and kinda makes me weak in the knees whenever I see you in it”.

Castiel couldn’t help but raise an amused brow, “You are a puzzle Dean….What is it that you want to tell me?”

Dean huffed, “Wow straight to the point huh Cas?” He ran a hand down his face, rubbing at his jaw before he said, “I haven’t been totally honest with my feelings towards you…..my true feelings for you that is”.

Castiel felt slightly jittery. He didn’t know what Dean was going to admit. He just hoped he could take it well and not break down in front of the man as he will most probably face the reality of losing his one true friend. He needed to stay strong. _Take it like a man, they say._ He swallowed, “I know what you are probably going to say Dean. That ….that you only find me a friend and that I make you feel uncomfortable. If you want me to leave than I will Dean?”.

Dean was astounded and a little irritated, “Cas stop putting words in my mouth. And that’s not what I am going to tell you ok…..It’s completely the opposite”.

 _What did Dean mean then?_ He knew his people skills were a little rusty and he sucked at evaluating emotions and reading between the lines but what else could Dean want to confess then? Maybe he should just let Dean talk. He apologized, “I’m sorry for jumping into conclusions Dean. What is it that you want to tell me?”

Dean cleared his throat, waving him off, “No I’m sorry Cas for being so abrupt. Um…”. He ensured to keep his focus on the baby blues before him, while shyly and softly grabbing a hold of Cas hands before saying, “Cas….my feelings for you are more than just platonic. I care about you more than in a _just friends_ manner. I….God I suck at this”.

Meanwhile, this little flame was starting to ignite within Castiels chest at Deans words. He had never seen the hunter looking so bashful before. He felt like encouraging Dean, squeezing Deans hands, without taking his eyes off Dean, he softly uttered, “Carry on Dean. Take your time”.

Deans heart fluttered. _Castiels warm grip felt so electrifying and welcoming._ Castiels words uplifted his spirits. He cleared his throat before he continued, “Cas. I love you….more than just a friend’s type of way….I always dreamed of being your boyfriend…your lover….You made me want you the very first moment I saw you in the barn…..and my feelings for you have only grown more stronger over the passing years”.

Castiel gulped, “Dean what are you saying?”

“I’m saying that I have been hiding my true feelings from you. Why? Because I was taught that it is wrong for a man to love another man by my father. I was able to hide it all these years mainly through boozing and sleeping with multiple women. But….no matter what I do, everytime I see you, I want to jump you there and then, I want to shower you with the love and affection you deserve, I want you to be my other half, I want to start…..I want to start a family with you”. He swallowed the lump in his throat, “I was a damn coward. When you admitted your love for me at the bar, I became terrified. The walls I had put up around me had started to crumble slowly and I was hit with all types of scenarios and resentment. I knew I had to do something or risk exposing my true feelings  for you…so I yelled at you, outright denied you and ….and seeked comfort in a woman….not only to show  you that I was supposedly straight but to prove to myself that I was still _Dean the ladies man”_. Dean shook his head, “I only ended up hurting you even more and that’s the last thing I ever wanted to do”.

Castiel scrunched his features, digesting all the information that he had received. It dawned on him what Dean was admitting. He slowly muttered, “So you really do have feelings for me just like I do you, but you chose to push your feelings aside because you were afraid?”

“Yes Castiel”, Dean repeated. 

Castiel literally felt a knife pierce through his heart as disbelief engulfed him, he repeated in a cold watery voice, “So you just let me think that you didn’t have feelings for me? Let me cry myself repeatedly to sleep at night? Intentionally made me see that Dean Winchester was never going to love me by bringing Natasha over and having loud sex with her?” His voice faltered at the end, “Made me think that I didn’t deserve to be loved?”

Dean felt himself shrivel up like a dried prune as self loathing and guilt filled him up. His stomach churned as he watched Castiels defeated yet unimpressed look. He stuttered, “Cas please. I’m sorry-“

Castiel interrupted with a cold, “No Dean! Stop right now!” He saw a tear cascade down Deans cheek as his own eyes welled up, “I know it was hard for you but I can’t…I can’t think of this right now. Dean….you broke my heart…..and everything I thought was an absolute lie”.

“Cas-“, Dean jumped in.

Cas held a finger up, “Quiet Dean”. All different emotions swirled inside of him. _It was too overwhelming and he needed time to process_. He took a deep breath, slipping his hands out of Deans and standing up, he said, “I need some quiet time Dean. I….I don’t think I’m in the right state of mind to even talk to you right now…..I’m going to go to my room…..please excuse me”. 

Deans heart was thumping hard against his ribcage. _Oh God_. He got up, grabbing lightly onto the angels bicep, “Cas please don’t go….we can fix this”.

Castiel ripped his arm out of Deans grasp, “Dean if you want to fix this than you will have to respect my wishes and give me time. I am not very happy right now and I need to be away from you. I can’t look at you right now Dean”.

Sams words rang in Deans mind. _Yes he will probably give you the cold shoulder or a good telling off, he has every right to._ With that thought Dean unconsciously blurted, “Do you hate me Cas?”

Castiels anger dissipated instantly at the insecure look Dean was spotting. He took a step close and cupped Deans cheek, thumbing at a stray tear as he softly muttered, “Dean I can never ever hate you. Don’t you ever think that please…..All I need is time to mull things over and than when I am ready I will come find you. You owe me that much Dean”.

Dean placed a hand on Cas' that was on his cheek, nodding, “Ok Castiel. That’s fair. I will be ready to talk whenever you are. Just….just know that I’m deeply sorry and that I love you…..I always have and always will”.

Castiels heart did a somersault , he pulled his hand away, “Thank you Dean”.

Dean watched the angel walk away. He trembled lightly as more tears flowed down his cheeks. He gasped lightly when he felt a firm hand rest on his shoulder, squeezing lightly. He felt comfort immediately radiate through the touch as Sams soft voice spoke from behind him, “Give him time bro. He will come around. Healing takes time. Come on….I’ll make you a cuppa”.

Dean closed his eyes, trying to gather his strength before he uttered, “Ok Sammy. I’ll give him his space”.

TBC

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Thoughts?
> 
> Feedback....
> 
> Comments and kudos please....xoxo!


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the late chapter guys ♡

**Dean**

_All Dean can do is wait_. Whenever Castiel is ready to talk then he will seek Dean out. But than again waiting is also hard because as every second, minute or hour passes, a feeling or sense of dread starts to build within Dean. Than he is hit with all sorts of negative thoughts. 

_Is Castiel going to forgive you? What if he never wants to be with you after this? What will happen when he realizes Dean is not good enough for him? Will he find someone else to love?_

That last question had him on the edge of his seat. He doesn’t think he can stand someone else sharing their affection with the angel he loves. _Kind of selfish on his part seeing as he has paraded countless women before Castiel._

He doesn’t deserve the angels understanding and forgiveness. That much he knows.

He was drawn out of his depressive thoughts when Sam uttered in a questioning tone, “Dean?”

Dean answered flatly, “Yeah?”

“What’s going on in that head of yours?”

A shred of hopelessness filling him up as he muttered, “I won’t blame Cas if he chooses not to forgive me. I deserve all the nasty that is heading my way”. He sighed tiredly, running a hand down his face, “Christ Sam you should have seen his face. He was really devastated”.

“That is expected Dean”, Sam added softly. “He just found out that his feelings were in fact returned by the one he truly loves. Maybe a tad bit overwhelming too”.

Dean glanced at Sam, timidly asking, “Do you think he will….you know……ever forgive me?”

That was a hard question to answer so Sam just went with his gut feeling. “To Be honest Dean, I know he will forgive you”.

“Why?” Dean blurted. “I wouldn’t forgive me”.

“Well that’s you Dean. As for Castiel, the angel loves you. He has been on earth long enough and he knows that people sometimes fall short. It’s human nature Dean. We all make mistakes. It’s owing up to those mistakes that make a difference. And I’m sure Cas may take that into consideration when making his decision”.

Dean asked quietly, “You really believe that?”

Sam firmly stated, “Yes I do Dean. I really do believe that”.

Dean swallowed looking towards the hallway which led to their rooms, muttering, “I do hope so Sam. I love him too much”.

* * *

 **Castiel**  

Castiel lay on his bed staring up at the ceiling. Everything that happened earlier was stuck on replay. The most brain twisting one was Deans confession of love for him. It was honestly surprising. All this time he had thought that Dean never loved him apart from brotherly. 

Castiel had had doubts in the past though. He always thought that Dean showed affection the way a man who would love someone in a non platonic way would do. That is what compelled him to believe that Dean did love him in a non brotherly way. He could have read Deans mind but he wasn’t that meddlesome.

All this confusion led to his drunken confession. But of course when Dean outright denied his affections than that was when Castiel began to question himself; _that maybe he had been reading things wrongly._ Obviously the shame, guilt and drop in self esteem followed. _But now?_

Now he just felt like he had been made a fool. Yes he was happy but because of Deans lie, it made him upset and slightly angry. _How could Dean do this?_

Then again, Dean did confess that his father raised he and Sam to view a man and man relationship as wrong. _Or in other words the whole LGBTQ community was wrong in the hardened man's eyes_.

Yes he knew that John was a vile and mostly cruel man. It made the man a great hunter. Vigilant and accurate. But the part where he condemned same sex couples was very nasty and thoughtless of him. They were like any regular person. 

That was the only thing that had calmed him down. It was the only thing that spoke reason to him. It was the only thing that was compelling him to give Dean another chance. It doesn’t mean that he is just going to drop everything and jump into the hunters arms. No. _Dean was going to have to work hard to earn his trust._ After all humans say, without trust in a relationship, it crumbles.

It was good to know that he wasn’t just a liability. 

He sighs rubbing his eyes. He was emotionally exhausted. Maybe a little shut eye would do him some good before he seeked Dean out. 

* * *

**Sam**

“Come on. Pick up. Pick up. Pick up”, Sam uttered as he waited for the person on the other end of the phone to answer. He sat up straight when the jovial voice answered.

“Now what may I do for you my sweet moose. Missing daddy already”.

Sam rolled his eyes, “Very funny Gabe. I actually need your help with something?”

Gabe sighed, “Oh Sammich the things I would do for you, my sunshine”.

Sam frowned slightly. He wondered what Gabriel meant by his dopey tone. _Anyway bigger matters to take care of._ He asked, “Is that a yes?”

“Yes it’s a yes Sammich”. Gabes voice than dropped to a teasing one, “But on one condition though”.

Sam sighed, he wondered what Gabe was up to now. He asked, “What is it Gabe?”

“That we discuss this important matter over dinner tonight ?”

Sam’s heart jumped, stuttering, “Wh-what?...N-No!”

Gabe added, “Than no dice”.

“Ok ok wait Damnit! ..Ye-yes Gabe”.

“Good Sammy. Wear something nice sweetheart”, Gabe smoothly uttered. “I’ll send ya the deets”.

Sam blushed at Gabes endearment. He added, “Ok Gabe. Um I’ll see you then”. He ended the call, unconsciously smiling.

Dean entered the Library, “What’s got you all flustered Sammy?”

Sam glanced at his smirking brother. He swears more color stained his cheeks. He puts on a façade, shrugging, “Nothing”.

Dean studies his brother for a few seconds before he huffs out, “Whatever. Anyway I’m going to the supermarket. Need anything?” Dean already picked up the keys, heading to the stairs.

Sam called out, “No nothing thanks”.

Sam watched his brother climb up the stairs. He knew the real reason Dean was going to the supermarket was to just get out of the place and drive. It was a way to soothe Dean. _Clear his head._

As for him, he glanced at his watch. It read 3pm. _Jeez time really flew fast._ There was a beep on his phone signaling a message and it read, _I’ll pick you up at 7pm from the bunker. Xoxo._

Sam should get irritated but right now all he is feeling is excitement. He was going to have dinner with Gabriel. _Oh jeez Louise….He hopes he can keep his feelings for the cocky angel at bay_. He has all these years of knowing Gabe. A few hours of dinner would be ok. _Right? Right?_

He wondered what the butterflies fluttering in his tummy meant though. _Somehow in the back of his mind he knew he was in trouble._

TBC

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Thoughts?
> 
> Feedback....
> 
> Comments and kudos please....xoxo!


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I apologize for the really late chapter...Writers block is not funny :(....Please forgive me ♡
> 
> Hope you enjoy this chapter :)
> 
> Dean out to clear his head...
> 
> Sam and Castiels convo...Sam gives Castiel his point of view...

Just listen to her purr. _Best sound ever._

 It filled him up with serenity. Just feeling the wind rustle his hair, breeze grace his face and the deep rumble of baby’s engine vibrating through his body was calming. 

He parked near a lake, deciding to get out and perch himself on baby’s hood. He closed his eyes and inhaled a deep breath before he opens his eyes to peer at the vision before him. _And my God is it magnificent or in other words breathtaking._

The orange rays of the almost setting sun, reflected on the glassy surface of the lake. He could hear the birds chirping in the trees while the wind sang it’s song. _Maybe he could bring Castiel here someday._

If the angel were to give him another chance that is.

He tried to place thoughts of Castiel temporarily at the back of his mind but truth is once he has the angel in mind, that’s it. Nothing can stop his thoughts from flowing. Not even the beautiful sight before him. The angel would always be the center of his universe besides Sammy.

He was so into the quietness that he almost jumped out of his skin when Metallica ripped through the air. _Christ his ears are getting too sensitive for this types of ringtones_. He glanced at the screen, it read _Sammy Calling._ His heart immediately raced as he answered, “Sammy? What's wrong? Is everything ok?”

“Woah Dean. Everything’s ok big bro”.

Dean ran a hand down his face, letting out a deep sigh, “Christ Sam. You know I worry everytime you call”.

Dean swore he could hear his brother smiling as he spoke through the phone. Sam asked, “Aww really? That’s sweet of you Dean”.

Dean rolled his eyes at his brothers teasing tone, “Shut up bitch”.

Sam cracked a laugh before he said, “ So I wanted to let you know that I am meeting a friend for dinner tonight at 7pm. If you could be back at the bunker before then. I don’t want to leave Cas on his lonesome”.

Without thinking Dean blurted, “Cas won’t be on his lonesome. I’ll be there Sammy”.

Sammy softly chuckled before humming, “Mhm. I know you won’t want Cas on his lonesome Dean”.

Once again, Dean rolled his eyes. His brother was _oh so funny_. Then a thought hit his mind. Sam had said he was going out to _dinner. Tonight. At 7pm. With a friend._ A hugh grin made it’s way onto his face as he announced, “You’re going on a date Sammy?”

Dean could hear Sam choke on whatever he was drinking before his brother cleared his throat, “I’m not going on a date Dean! It’s just dinner!”

“Aha. You sure Sammy? Because it’s fine you know. I’m actually happy if you're  going to go on a date with her or is it a him? I don’t judge”.

“Not a date Dean”, Sam repeated.

“Whatever makes you sleep at night Sammy”, Dean retorted. “Anyway, I’ll be there in another hours time. I’ll probably catch ya before you leave or if I don’t a word of advice ...”.

Sam huffed, “What Dean?”

“Don’t put out on the first date baby bro. Thems the rules”.

Dean barked a laugh as Sam groaned a complaint before saying _bye_ and hanging up the phone. 

All he thought was that at least one of them was heading towards happiness. 

* * *

 

Sam didn’t know what to wear. Why was he stressing about what to wear damnit? He was just going out to dinner with Gabe. 

_Not just a dinner with Gabe Sam. More like a date._

Yeah and who asked you?

_Gabe said to put on something nice?_

Shut up! 

Christ here he was having an argument with his conscience. He sighed holding the two shirts in front of the mirror. _Its either the blue or the white long sleeved shirt._

“Go with the white one Sam”.

Sam jumped slightly at the gruff voice, turning around to see the blue eyed angel standing by his door, “Christ Cas. You can give a guy a heart attack”.

“I apologize Sam. It’s not my intention to give you a heart attack”, Cas voiced sincerely, looking a little downcast.

Sam felt horrible and immediately blurted, “Hey Cas it’s fine. Just startled me is all”.

Cas nodded. The angel then squinted his eyes, “Where are you heading off to if you don’t mind me asking?”

Sam smiled at the angels politeness, “Well um I am going out to dinner with a friend Cas”.

“Oh ok Sam. Well you enjoy your night out”. The angel than looked to the hallway, “Um where’s Dean?”

Sam studied the curious look of the angel, “Um he went for a drive Cas. He said he will be back in about another hours time”. 

Castiel bit at his lip, looking slightly weary, “Is he ok?”

Sam found it truly remarkable and touching  that Cas could show concern for his dickbag of a brother. _The angel was a pure being_. IS a pure being even though he has killed a few in his time here on earth. _Castiels heart was always in the right place._ He answered, “Cas he is fine. Just needed a breather”.

Castiel looked like he was deep in thought, mouth downturned. The angel glanced at Sam with an even more apprehensive look, voice shaky as he asked, “Sam do you think Dean will go back to Natasha?”

That seemed to knock the air out of Sam as he gawped for a second before exclaiming, “Of course not Cas. Dean would never do that to you ok”.

Castiel folded his arms across his chest, jaw jutting out, “I’m sorry if I’m having a hard time keeping my thoughts about Dean in check Sam. He has quite the reputation and normally goes out for mainly booze or women”.

Sam was instantly filled with irritation and a surge of protectiveness. If there was one thing he wouldn’t tolerate, then that’s people saying nasty things about his brother particularly on assumption and past experiences alone. _Haven’t they heard of people can change_.

He dumped his shirts on his bed before he faced Castiel, voice tight as he spoke, “Cas. I am only going to say this once so listen up….You are a good friend of mine and I respect you..  but despite that I will still speak up for my brother if he is not here and if he hasn’t done anything wrong….You’re wrong about Dean. He is not boozing or looking for women right now-“.

Castiel once again looked guilty and wanted to say something. He started, “Sam I-“.

But Sam wasn’t done yet. He held up a finger, silencing the angel. He continued,  “Cas my brother has a very crazy lifestyle. Living on the edge and living like it’s his last day on earth, however, Dean is not completely insensitive. Dean had had to go through a lot with dad and he has made a lot of mistakes in his life…ALOT. But I know Dean better than anyone else. If he has made up his mind to pursue something than I guarantee he will pull through fighting tooth and nail. He won’t want to screw it up. So believe me when I say, you are the most important person to him at this very moment and he is not going to just throw that all away, now that he has admitted his love for you. Dean is a way better man than that”.

Castiel now felt like a total insensitive ass. He let his jealousy and anger get the better of him. He aimed a slightly red Sam an apologetic look. He uttered, “Sam I want to say I’m sorry. I just let my emotions and insecurities get the better of me. Please forgive me”.

Sam sighed. The last thing he wants is to be pissed at Cas. Plus he understood why the angel had procured negative thoughts regarding Dean. _His brother was not a saint._ He took a deep breath and smiled, “Cas all is forgiven. All I ask is that you give Dean a chance to prove his worth because I promise you my brother doesn’t know how to give up. It’s not in his nature. You and I both know that”.

Castiel knew Sam was right. _Dean was a fighter and a compassionate human._ Maybe all they needed was to start afresh. He felt hope rekindle within him. He aimed Sam a grateful look, “I am willing to try Sam…if Dean is. Thank you for clearing my mind. I will wait for Dean to arrive and I will speak with him.” Castiel than made his way to Sam’s door but before he could exit, he turned and faced the smiling hunter. He blurted, “Enjoy your date Sam”. The angel than walked away.

Sam grumbled, “It’s not a date”.

_Yes it is Sam. A date with Gabe._

“Shut up!”

TBC

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Thoughts?
> 
> Feedback....
> 
> Comments and kudos please....xoxo!


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Castiel meets Sams date...uh oh?
> 
> This chapter is mostly Sam, Gabe, Castiel and a little bit of Dean in the end :)

A bleep was heard signaling a message on Sams phone. He chewed at his bottom lip as he picked up his phone that was lying on his bed and opening the message.

_Heya my sweet Adonis. I’m outside. Get that fine ass here pronto._

Sam couldn’t help his fluttering heart and the _GOD FORBID girlish giggle_ that left his mouth. He slapped a hand onto his mouth, looking wide eyed around his room to make sure no one was around. _Thank the heavens_. Dean would have had a field day and Castiel would probably go on an over-analytic review of 'why the girlish giggle is not _man appropriate'._

 _Oh bother_. He takes a deep breath before tapping away a reply of _‘I’m on my way’_.

He gave himself a once over in the mirror. Damn Cas was right about choosing the white long sleeved shirt. _Nice and snug._

_****_

He made his way to the map room passing Cas who was going through an angel lore book. The angel looked so immersed in whatever he was reading so Sam decided to take a peek. _Oh boy he wished he hadn’t._

Cas was reading a book on _Angel Human Mating: How To Woo Your Human._

_What the hell did the man of letters need an angel book on wooing for?_

Sam gave his head a shake before he took a step back. He gently announced, “Cas I’m leaving now”.

Cas’ head immediately shot up at the same time he shut the book creating a loud bang. He stuttered, “O-Oh ok Sam”. 

Sam wanted to laugh at the angels bug eyed look. He held his laughter in, clearing his throat, “Um so I’ll see ya probably in another two to three hours tops”. Sam turned and started making his way slowly to the iron stairs that led to the main entrance. But then he stopped in his tracks when he heard footsteps behind him. He turned around only to have Castiel almost run into him. He instantly blurted, “Cas what’re you doing?”

Cas tilted his head to the side, “Well I’m escorting you to your dates car Sam. I also feel obligated to meet this mystery friend. I’m sure it’s what family do before someone goes out on a first date”.

Sam gawped. _Oh crap!_ Cas can’t know who he is going on a date….NO dinner with. His heart was now thumping against his ribcage as he tried to search for something to convince Cas. He stuttered, “C-Cas you don’t have to d-do tha-that man. And um the family meeting before first date...um part. That’s mostly for younglings like teens. It’s rare for um adults. So I’m all set. Don’t worry about it okay”.

Castiel squinted his eyes, speaking in his ridiculous monotonic smoky voice, “Sam if Dean were here, he would have wanted to meet your date. I will go in his stead”.

Sam gulped as Castiel walked past him and up the stairs. _Oh double crap!_ He jogged after Cas all the while with his _fingers, toes…uh whatever crossed_ that this wouldn’t end up a catastrophic first meet. God he felt like a teen introducing his boyfriend to his parents. 

_Lord help him._

* * *

Gabriel was leaning smartly against his yellow Lamborghini. _Oh yeah he could so afford one._ Well if you call mind washing a few people into selling him one affordable. _What he was an arch angel, sue him._

He heard the chink of the door lock before the heavy metal bunker door opened. He was about to throw in his world’s most charming smile when _not Sam_ walked out. _Oh look it’s the angel Castiel_. Gabriel almost cracked up when he saw Cas' eyes widen while his jaw dropped. He winked, “Heya Cassie poo. You might catch some flies with that fly trap”. He gestured Castiels still agape mouth.

Castiel slipped out of his initial shock. He immediately folded his arms across his chest, foot rapidly tapping on the ground as he shook his head, “What are your intentions with Sam Gabriel?!”

 _Christ Castiel was acting like his over protective brother Dean._ Sam jumped in, “Castiel I’m….”.

“Shush Sam!” Castiel held up a finger halting the hunters words. He scrutinized the still smiling arch, “What. Are. Your. Intentions. With. Sam. Gabriel? Answer. Me?!”

“Relax Cassie poo. Just want to take that tall drink of water out on a nice charming date”.

Castiel bit back, “Sam is not a piece of meat Gabriel!”

Gabriel puts his hands up in a placating gesture, “Woah bro. Sam is way more important than a one time romp. Oh no Sammy here is a pearl. A very rare one indeed. I just want to take him out and show how lucky I am to be graced by his presence”. He winked at a now flushed out Sam, eyes roaming the snug blue denims and white long sleeved shirt, “By the way Sam, you look hella smoking”.

Sam swore his whole face was red and his heart was trying to dance its way out of his chest. _Maybe doing the rumba_. Why. Was. He. Feeling. Like. This? STOP IT! Nevertheless to lessen a few of Castiels worries, he had to show that he was comfortable with Gabe. And he did feel genuinely comfortable despite feeling giddy. He cleared his throat, “Um Thank you Gabe. You look nice yourself”. Sam gestured at Gabriel’s velvet silk long sleeved shirt and black slacks. 

“Well I am flattered Sammy”. He then aimed Castiel a smirk, “Now may I take my date out blue eyes?”

Castiel glanced back and forth between Sam and Gabe. _It would be unfair to hold Sam back._ He sighed, “Fine”. But before he let the pair go he aimed Gabe a serious look, “You better not make Sammy upset or treat him like trash Gabe OR ELSE!”

Gabe didn’t really want to know what OR ELSE entailed. The angel was a damn good soldier and he didn’t really want to be meeting the end of the angels blade. Not even when he is an arch. He held out a hand to Sam who just stared at it looking cofused. Gabe chuckled, “Grab it Sammich. No time to waste handsome”.

Sam was caught in the middle of how warm his heart felt due to Cas’ concern for him and how fuzzily lightheaded he felt when he slipped his hand into Gabes. The mans warm firm grasp sent tingling sensations up his arm and made him surely blush harder. He looked at Cas, smiling, “I’ll be fine Cas. Thank you for your concern. Gabe and I must get going for our dinner”.

“Date”, Castiel and Gabe both corrected at the same time before the angels shared a smile that lit up their eyes.

Sam rolled his eyes. He huffed, “Fine….a date”. He then proceeded to pout, “But I’m only saying this because everyone else is”.

“That’s because everyone else sees it for what it is Sammy”, Gabe added smartly. The arch grasped Sams other hand, now holding both. He thumbed at Sams’ wrist soothingly, asking, “Do you not wish it to be a date Sam? We can call it a dinner if you want? No pressure”.

Sam studied the jovial arch before him. But he could still see the underlying worry in the angels light brown eyes. He didn’t want to lie to himself because he honestly was secretly wishing that it was a date _. He always had a thing for the cocky angel with a smart mouth._ And right now he was going to trust his heart. He cleared his throat, replying softly while gazing directly into Gabes eyes, “I would like it to be our first date Gabe”.

Gabe beamed a full on toothy smile. He opened Sam’s door, “Please seat yourself comfortably in my sweet ride oh Sammy my Sammy”.

Sam chuckled and slipped in. Gabe then turned to a faraway looking angel who stared at them with a small smile but not really here with them. He asked, “What are you thinking of Cassie poo?”

Castiels eyes shot to Gabes. A tinge of pink colored his lower neck moving up to his cheek. The angel shrugged, “Nothing Gabe. You just have an amazing dinner with your date. And take care of him please”.

Gabriel really liked how Castiel was always so protective over the hunter brothers. He also knew what Castiel was probably thinking of. _Come on anyone who has seen the interactions between Cas and Dean would sense that they were into each other._ Those two were an open book. _Well to him they were_. He clapped his hands together, “Ok Cas. We’ll see ya soon angel”. He made his way to the other side but before he climbed in he winked, “Oh and don’t worry I’m sure Deano will come to his senses and take you out on a first date. I’m sure that bugger will make you swoon blue eyes”.

Castiels heart fluttered and this feeling of hope and yearning started to climb within him. He watched as the car reached their junction just as Deans Impala turned in. The cars stopped side by side and he was assuming that Dean was engaging Gabe with scrutiny and questions. After a whole two minutes, Deans car then sped over skidding to a halt before him. The door flew open and a scowling Dean got out. Castiel sighed, “So you’re not happy with Gabe taking Sam out huh?”

Dean grumbled, “Well can’t actually like someone who killed me God knows how many times”. He then asked, “But really? Gabe and Sam? Sam should know better then to date that candy loving creep. I swear the angel is a damn basket case”.

Castiel couldn’t help but feel a little irritated by Deans words. _He wasn't  going to defend Gabe but for Sam he would._ He folded his arms across his chest, “Sam likes Gabe Dean. He is allowed to like whomever he wants. I’m sure Sam is allowed to make choices he wants for himself. I’m sure he believes that people or angels for this matter can change. And I suggest you let Sam decide for himself what he wants. He is smart and great at analyzing a person”.

“Not great at analyzing that thing though”, Dean grumbled.

“What thing Dean?” Castiels patience was running thin.

“That yellow thing you call a car! Hideous!”

Castiel rolled his eyes, “Its called a Lamborghini Dean”.

“Cas he shouldn’t be going out with a person or whatever drives that. And I mean come on anyone but that archangel”.

Castiel was at the end of his rope biting out, “Dean stop it Now! Enough! You’re acting like a petulant child with a tantrum! Drop it! Sam is a capable young man and definitely old enough to be making his own decisions!”

Dean gawped at Castiels outburst and the defensive look he shot him. That should be making him run for the hills but instead it was filling him up with want. Above all that he was filled with warmth at the protectiveness Castiel had over Sam. He raised his hands up in a placating gesture, “Hey Cas. Sorry. Guess I’m just being a protective brother. I get that way with Sam”.

Castiel released a deep breath, relaxing his features and posture. He added softly, “If it makes you feel better I have warned Gabe. I told him not to hurt Sam in any way or he will have me to deal with. I’m sure he won’t be trying anything funny. In fact, he looks like he will be sweeping Sam off his feet tonight. Sam deserves a little attention and affection”.

Dean smiled at the angel, “Thanks for making sure Sam is going to be taken care of Cas. I appreciate it”. He then cleared his throat, rubbing at the back of his neck, “So should we um talk, watch a movie on Netflix or nap it out while waiting for Sam?” Dean was going to let Castiel take the lead.

Castiel bit at his bottom lip nervously. He inhaled a deep breath through his nostrils before uttering, “I think we should go inside and talk Dean”.

Green stared into blue. Dean nodded and gestured towards the entrance of the bunker, “Lead the way angel”.

TBC

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Thoughts?
> 
> Feedback...
> 
> Comments and kudos please...xoxo!


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter...Sorry it took so long ♡
> 
> This chapter is where Dean and Cas talk...
> 
> And it gets a little steamy in the end...
> 
> SORRY FOR THE TORTUROUS ENDING OF CHAPTER....HEHEHE ;)...Promise to make up for it in the next chapter ;)

Castiel led Dean back into their massive bunker library whereby he walked over to the large mahogany table, taking a seat by the top. He waited patiently as Dean approached the table, slowly pulling out the chair and taking a seat on the right side, just by Cas.

Castiel glanced at his own threaded fingers atop the table, taking in the silence for a whole minute before he softly admitted, “Dean I don’t know how to begin”.

“I know what you mean Cas”. Dean swallowed, before catching the angels blue gaze, “How about you start with whatever you really want to get out? From there we can get the conversation flowing”.

Castiel nodded. He was pretty sure he was blushing when he uttered, “Did you really find me attractive at the barn?”

Dean raised an amused brow, clearly surprised by the angels question. He was actually expecting Castiel to tear him a new one. He answered with a small grin, “Well yes Cas. I found you hella attractive even in your dorky outfit”. Deans eyes followed Castiels shy smile as the angel proceeded to bite at his lower lip. _Lord save him from snatching the angel forward to kiss the living shit out of him._

“Dean”.

Dean cleared his throat breaking his staring contest, “Yeah Cas?”

“What did you find attractive in me? What……caught your attention?”

“Are you kidding me Cas? Have you looked in the mirror?” Dean sighed, “Look. I was secretly into men but I pushed it away. Then you came along. Cas….the first moment or second I laid eyes on you, I knew I was screwed. You come busting in with your ‘ _no bullshit_ ’ attitude, that crazy sex hair, those damn sexy pair of pink puckers and those ocean blue eyes. How the hell was I not to react? And don’t get me started on your damn stirring gravelly voice”.

“So you mostly fell in love with my physical side?” Castiel frowned. “Physical attraction is not all important Dean. It’s why people become unhappy. They don’t love the heart but the looks”.

Dean laid his hand gently on the angels. “Cas…..I’m not going to deny finding your physical features hot. It was the first thing that captured my interest….I could have easily chucked it off to just another attractive person I could bang and leave….but I couldn’t Cas….you awoke something else within me….maybe a little spark…..and from that moment I knew that this wasn’t going to be easy because I genuinely found you annoying but at the same time was enamored and I kinda liked you….And as the first few months you have been spending with us on and off went by.…me getting to know the type of self sacrificing, clueless angel you were, I just…..I fell even further, even deeper….And I knew if I didn’t do something, then I would break….So I slept around with women, drank, and kept you at a distance. Dick move".

Castiel tried to process Deans words, “Dean we could have been something good from the start. You chose to push it away because of your fears”.

Cas words stung. He could feel the immediate guilt and regret filling him up. He pulled his hand away from Cas, swallowing a lump in his throat as he stared at his now clasped hands atop the table. He was unable to meet Castiels gaze, “Cas. I had a lot going on and I know that’s a ridiculous excuse for my behavior. I guess I have been so accustomed to shoving my desires away because deep down I firmly believe I do not deserve anything good in my life. And that includes you Cas”. He finally met Cas' searching gaze, “I couldn't just drag you along for a ride...I just couldn't do that…not even to a fierce big hearted angel like you. I valued you more than I ever have anyone”.

“But Dean I am more than capable of holding my own ground”.

Dean huffed, “Oh I know that Angel. But you were way too important to be facing the full brunt of my daddy issues. I just wasn’t going to let that happen Cas”.

“Dean you still hurt me either way”, Castiel retorted.

“I wasn’t doing it intentionally Cas. I didn't  even know you liked me back”.

“Well Natasha was intentional! And I don’t like you….I love you! I’m surprised you didn’t pick it up”. Castiel folded his arms across his chest, fixing Dean a stone faced look. “Aren’t you humans good at reading emotions and behavior?!”

Dean felt a twinge of guilt whenever Natasha’s name was brought about. Right now though he was more focused on Castiels petulant reaction and it was kinda getting him irritated. He really didn’t want to react in anger because Castiel didn’t deserve it. _He was the asshole here._

He took a deep breath, pinching the bridge of his nose, “Cas I can’t tell you how sorry I am about the whole Natasha incident. It was a major dick move. And as for the whole human reading emotions thing…..well have you met me? I suck at emotions big time….that’s Sams department”.

“Or you were too blinded by your DISGUST FOR ME that you just let it slip by you!” Castiel couldn’t hold back. He wished he did when Dean threw him a hurt look which soon morphed into an angry one. _There's the hunter._

Dean saw Castiel startle when he got up abruptly making his chair scrape the surface of the floor harshly. He really didn’t care right now as fire ran through his veins. He paced back and forth before he locked eyes with a slightly troubled looking Castiel who still had his hands folded across his chest. He blurted, “Disgusted?! Disgusted by you?! For fuck sake Cas! I had my reservations, my secrets as to why I didn’t push my feelings for you! But don’t you EVER say that I was disgusted by you! NEVER!”

Castiel felt like a major ass for what he just said. He knew Dean was genuine because of his reaction. He was just so irritated. But if they wanted to move ahead then he needed to try and put the past behind him. He inhaled deeply through his nostrils, feeling a little anger ebb away from him. He swallowed, “Dean I’m sorry. Forgive me”.

Dean sighed placing both hands on his hips, blowing out a hugh breath. _This was not the direction he wanted to go_. Get yourself together Dean. He faced the angel and with a gruff tone he added, “You have nothing to apologize for Castiel”. He sighed, “I’m tired Cas. I’m trying to keep my freaken shit together. And I don’t know how long I can do this. I know I said to take your time but Cas I….I don’t know….I just….I need to know what’s going to happen?” Dean tried to control his tears as his heart ached at his next words, “And judging by our conversation today….you probably don’t want me in your life….And I’m totally going to respect that I promise…..I just….I need to hear that there can never be an us from you".

Castiels heart actually thumped hard as his stomach churned. The hurt he saw swimming in Deans eyes was raw and out there. He never ever intended for Dean to think that he would never want him. Castiel was done with the fights, the negative emotions. They were both extremely exhausted.

Without further thought, he got up and stalked towards the hunter who was now leaning against the wall for support. He stood a feet away from a curious and wrecked Dean, “We are going to put all of this behind us from this moment on Dean.  I will always love you and I am willing to give us a second chance. I already made up my mind that I want you Dean. YOU. ARE. MINE!” 

Dean felt warmth and arousal at Castiels serious look and words. ' _You are mine'_  really drove straight for home base.

He felt all hot at the angels closeness that all he could manage was a nod and a squeak, “Cas”.

Castiel felt desirable stirring in many parts of his body. He sensed the same from Dean and seeing the hunter being turned to mush before him would be one of his greatest achievements. This only made him bolder as he stared into Deans hooded eyes that gazed into his.

He took another step forward crowding the hunter against the wall, their faces only a mere inches apart. His breathing had increased and so did the hunters. He rested a hand on Deans waist, while his other was against the wall by Deans head. He ensured to stare intensely into the hunters green eyes, “Dean. Make me yours. Only yours”.

That was it. Whatever control Dean was hanging onto slipped. He placed a hand on the middle of Cas back, with the other at the back of Castiels head, pulling the angel in until their lips clashed in a deep searing kiss. The angel tasted so sweet so good. He growled when their tongues twisting like they were both fighting and hungry.

After a whole minute, Dean wanted to pick this up a notch, so with one swift move he had Castiel pinned up against the wall as they ground their hard bulges into one another while their kisses turned even more deeper, filthier and passionate.

Dean had one thought in mind. _He was going to make the angel his right fucking now_.

TBC

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Thoughts?
> 
> Feedback....
> 
> Comments and kudos....xoxo!


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ok long chapter....
> 
> Sam and Gabes date....
> 
> Dean and Castiel get frisky ;)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Writing sex scenes are real tough but hey I tried :)

Sam was blushing throughout the whole dinner. Gabe had literally gone  for romantic candlelight dinner under the stars.

The angel had zapped them to a private island  somewhere in the Caribbean where they were now settled on a beach chomping on luxurious seafood and zipping on wine.

Sam was also quite surprised with the arch. He half expected Gabe to pull out one of his ridiculous ' _I wanna get in your pants'_ moves. But the angel was a charmer. And Sam liked the attention. 

“So Sammich what did ya want to talk about?”

Sam sighed, “Well I was wanting to talk about Castiel and Dean. I was thinking that maybe they need a little nudge towards each other. I mean I know Dean is all on board but I was hoping that you could maybe speak to Cas. Not that I haven’t though. Thought it’d be nice coming from his brother”.

Gabriel clicked his tongue, “Ah so finally the beans have spilled. And let me guess Deano acted like an ass and Castiel got hurt”.

“Yup. Basically. They did talk a few things through and Castiel said that he needed time to think. I’m just worried that Cas might not be so forgiving. And he has every right to kick Dean to the curb. It’s just I think that they would be making a mistake if it turns towards that direction”.

Gabriel studied Sams concerned look, “You really do care huh?”

Sam huffed, “Of course I care Gabe. My brothers feelings and heart is on the line.”

“Which is due to his own stupidity and cowardice”, Gabriel added.

Sam grit his teeth, “Gabe my brother had his reasons for what he did. We shouldn’t be so hasty to judge. They say everything in its own time, well I’m kinda happy that everything is out in the open now rather than before. You want to know why?”

Gabe put his hands up in a placating gesture, “Why Sam?”

“Because if Dean would have allowed Castiel to be his lover earlier then things would have ended up being a mess for both of them. Reason being Dean wasn’t ready at the time. But now after getting to know Cas better through all these years, getting more comfortable with the angel, then I would say he is ready”.

“What makes you say that he won’t hurt Cas this time Sammy?”

“Because this time he’s sure about what he wants and he is hella ready to pursue it”, Sam answered without hesitation. 

Gabe studied Sam for a while before a big grin graced his face. He clenched at his heart dramatically, “Aww our little Deano is all grown up”.

Sam rolled his eyes, “Anyway are you going to speak with Cas?”

Gabe smacked his lips together, tapping his finger on his lips, before saying, “Ok tell you what. If Cas and Dean are not ok when we get back to the bunker then I give you my word that I will talk to Cas. That ok?”

Sam nodded, “Thank you Gabe”.

“Hold on a minute Sammich. There’s something that I ask from you in return”.

Sam folded his arms across his chest, “I thought that dinner would cover it Gabe”.

“Oh come on Sammich”. He added, “You must remember that I’m putting my life on the line. I mean one wrong move with Cas and I’m gone.... poof”.

“Gabe you’re an arch and Castiel is human now. I’m sure you can handle him”.

“Human or not Sam, Castiel is still a firecracker and he is a damn fine soldier. There’s a reason us angels feel an inkling of fear whenever Castiels name arises”. He leaned in, playing with the hem of Sams sleeve, “So why not sweeten the pot hmm? I’m sure that’s not much to ask Sammy”.

Sam wrinkled his nose. Gabe was sometimes too over dramatic. But guess he has a point. He sighs, “Fine. What is it that you want in return Gabe?”

“A kiss Sammy. A nice soft sweet kiss from you”.

Sam's heart jumped as he began to feel flushed. He stuttered, “Um wh-what?”

“You heard me sweetheart. A kiss”, Gabe winked.

“And what if everything is A-Ok with Cas and Dean? What then?” Sam challenged.

Gabe bit his bottom lip, “Then we shall have a kiss as part of our first date”.

Sam couldn’t help the smile that formed on his lips. He leaned in, whispering, “Deal Gabe. I guess I owe you for the wonderful first date. Plus gotta stick to the rules of first date aye”.

“Oh Sammich you sly dawg”. Gabe smiled, “So tell me will it be chaste or with a little give?”

It was Sams time to smirk, “Sorry you just have to wait and see aye”. He laid a hand atop Gabes squeezing lightly. 

The stars and moon smiled down upon them both, happy to witness this wonderful union.

* * *

 

**Meanwhile in the bunker….**

They had somehow managed to make it to Deans room. But not before bumping into walls and furniture as they refused to take their hands and lips off one another. _Both lovers just craved for more._

Dean now had Castiel laying naked on his bed as clothes came off somewhere along the way. While standing he took the opportunity to rake his eyes along the angels flushed milky lean body. There was not one ounce of fat, just wonderfully curved and cut ridges and dips, beautiful pink nipples, a strong chest, narrow hips, sharp hipbones, milky strong muscular thighs that belonged to a nice pair of long legs, nice pair of tight just right sized sacks and a beautiful cock with a light pink head. And my what a sight it was. He uttered huskily, “My God you’re beautiful Cas”.

Castiel could see Deans eyes ablaze with want. _The hunter had the body of a Greek God._ The plains and tight abs are a glorious sight. And as his eyes dropped lower to find what he had been searching for, a moan escaped his lips at the plump and swollen 10 inch thick member hanging between the hunters thighs. He licked his lips, shuddering, “Dean…I want you now”.

Dean climbed onto the bed, running the tips of his fingers down the inner thighs of his lover. His lips soon followed, licking, nipping and sucking that soft skin along Castiels thighs. He laid a tender kiss on the head of Castiels cock before he moved to his lovers hipbone. He tongued at the sharp hipbones feeling his lover tremble as he playfully dipped his thumb into his belly button.

He chuckled as his lover let out a whimper, he teased, “Like how I’m worshiping you Cas?”. He dipped his tongue into Castiels belly button making him quake. He hummed, “Mmm baby you deserve to be worshiped”.

Castiel was feeling many physical sensations all at once. What Deans mouth, hands and fingers were doing to him was literally breaking him apart in a real pleasurable way. _It was bordering on hypnotic and nearly maddening._ He cried out as Deans mouth closed over his right hard nub, while the hunters thumb sensually messaged the left. He threw his head back as sparks ignited from his sensitive buds, “Oh Dean. Mhm”.

Castiels reactions was having an equal effect on Dean. His member was throbbing and more engorged as precum leaked heavily. He loved worshiping Castiels body and he would spend the rest of his life doing so but right now he needed to speed things up a little. He paid equal attention to the other hard nub before he kissed up the angels chest. He kissed up the column of Castiels throat, biting down on all the angels pressure points. 

“Hmm Dean. Oh Dean I don’t know how much I can take. Please I need more”.

Dean ran his lips up Castiels jaw until he claimed the angels lips in a deep tongue filled kiss while he ran a hand up Castiels torso and thigh. He brought his hips down enabling his cock to meet Castiels throbbing member. The lovers moaned into each others mouths at the hot erotic feeling of their cocks sliding and rubbing against one another’s.

While they continued their rutting Dean felt blindly under the pillow for the bottle of lube. He pulled out the bottle and tore his lips off Castiels to kiss down the angels jaw. He stopped his ministrations to glance at Cas. The angel was an absolute horny wreck. Dean preened internally with pride. He caught the angels hooded gaze, “Ready for more Cas?”

“Yes Dean I’m ready for more”, Castiel ran his hands up Deans sweaty chest then down his biceps. “Please my hunter”.

Dean mashed his lips onto Cas' once more sucking the angels tongue into his mouth hungrily as he popped the cap for the lube. He pulled his lips away from Cas hearing the angel whine and pull his head back in for more kissing. Dean let the angel indulge as they continued to kiss deep and searing before he pulled away softly, “Baby more later ok. Let me take care of you”.

All Castiel could do was nod. There was too much fire coursing within him, it was a little overwhelming. He decided he had a knew obsession; Deans lips. _Maybe he could indulge later._ He and Dean were together now so kissing would be at the top of his list.

He gasped as a wet finger circled his asshole. He spread his legs further apart, and watched as Deans lips ran along his thighs. He was a little unsettled by the feeling of a finger circling his intimate place but with Deans coaxing and kisses he began to relax and that’s when he felt the finger press in. He felt his hole resisting.

“Relax baby. I got you”, Dean kissed his lovers belly. “You gotta relax to let me in”.

After a little time Castiel began to relax and soon he felt the finger press in further. He was trying to breath through the intrusion when Deans finger met something inside him that instantly made his body convulse in pleasure. He grabbed at the sheets as his back bowed, “Oh Dean. Oh yes! More!”

Christ Dean once again had to squeeze the base of his dick. _Shit Castiel was fucking hot right now_. He kept on finger fucking Cas every once in a while rubbing at the angels prostate. Once the hole loosened he decided to add another. The angel was thrashing in pleasure as he begged for more. Dean stammered, “F-fuck Cas”. Soon Dean was adding a third.

“Dean enough! Please fill me up with your cock! Oh I need it now!”

“Cas baby just a little more ok”, Dean soothed.

But Cas couldn’t take it anymore. He pulled out Deans fingers from him, and flipping the stunned hunter onto his back. He straddled the hunter and grit out, “I said I need it now Dean!” With those words Castiel reached back and stroked Deans cock before lining it up with his hole and sliding down to the hilt. He threw his head back and cried out, “Oh Dean yes!”

Dean threw his head back, eyes rolling to the back of his skull as he shuddered and yelled, “F-fuck Castiel! Fuck baby! Ahh!” Dean had never felt anything so good around his dick before. _Not until today_. He watched slightly unfocused as Castiel began to rotate his hips. _Oh the angel had skills._ He brought his knees up and grabbed onto Castiels waist, “Mm yeah you like that baby. Wanna bounce on my hard cock. It’s all yours”.

Castiel licked his lips and ran his hands up Deans pectorals. He leaned in and sucked Deans bottom lip between his lips tonguing at it before let it go with a pop. He whispered, “Oh I know your cock is mine Dean….forever. Now I’m going to take your monster for a test drive”.

“Fuck Cas”, Dean ground his feet into the mattress, trying to resist the urge to fuck up into his lover.

Castiels braced his hands on Deans sweaty pectorals before he lifted himself up Deans cock and slid back down. Both angel and hunter cried out loud and hard as a rhythm was set. Castiel felt heat build up within his groin and the bottom of his spine. “Oh Dean”.

The angel was riding Dean hard like a damn pro. Deans vision kept on losing focus as his pleasure climbed. The feeling of Castiels walls hugging his cock nice and snug was driving him to his peak faster than expected. His grip on the angels waist tightened and he started to drive his cock up into Cas. “Oh yeah. Oh baby. Fuck so tight. Gonna have you bouncing on my cock all night and day”.

“Oh Dean! More!” Castiels continued to slam down harder into Dean and finally hitting his prostate Dead on. “Oh yes right there!”

Dean wasn’t a lazy bugger. He rammed up into Cas repeatedly hitting his lovers sweet spot with ever thrust in. Castiel was practically bouncing on Deans cock and if the hunter didn’t grab a hold of Cas' waist then his lover would probably be bouncing off his cock. His grunts started to get louder and his toes kept on curling on and off, “Oh fuck Castiel. Christ baby!”

“Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah!” Castiels chanted shakily. “More”. 

Dean felt the breathless angel slowing down. _Well guess it’s his turn._ He flipped Castiel around until the angel was on his back and pushing the angels thighs up before he began plunging deep and hard. They were almost hanging off the bed but this didn’t stop the pair. Dean cried out as he slid in deeper, “Oh baby! Ugh! So good!”

Castiel was delirious as Dean drove his hugh cock into him. He quaked and shivered hard, spreading his legs further apart wanting more. He watched the flushed, sweating, blissed out look his lover had on and he couldn’t resist. He pulled Dean in and their lips connected in wet open mouthed kisses that mainly had to do with gasping for air. “Oh yes! Yes uh!”

The only sounds in the room was the hard creaking of the mattress, the loud pants, grunts and moans combined with the slapping of balls to skin. The room wreaked of sex and sweat as the lovers chased their orgasms.

Dean could feel his balls start to tighten and Castiels hole was fluttering and squeezing tightly around his cock. His lover was trembling hard, just as he. _They were on the verge of climax._ This propelled him to ram in deeper and harder, “Oh Cas! Baby I’m close!”

“Dean! I don’t know what’s happening! I feel like I’m going to combust!” Castiel cried out. He had never felt this way before and he didn’t know what was happening particularly in his nether regions.

Dean continued to plough Castiel ramming his prostate dead on while he ran a hand down the side of Castiels hair, bringing his mouth to his lovers ear whispering, “Let go Cas. Just let it flow ahh! Fuck…Cas come for me baby”.

And Castiel listened. He couldn’t control the fire anymore. He gripped onto Deans shoulder hard, his back bowing as a white hot sensation flooded throughout his being. His eyes rolling into the back of his head as he trembled and came hard with a loud shuddering yell.

Dean was caught off guard by Castiels very strong orgasm and his cock was practically sucked in as the hole fluttered hard around his member. And that was it Dean let out a deep loud glutteral moan as he shot his load deep into Castiel. “Ahh Cas! Fuck!”

The lovers held on to each others sweaty bodies as they came down from their highs. After a few minutes of just heavy breathing, Dean hovered shakily over Castiel, running a hand down the angels flushed and sweaty face. Blue met green. Dean leaned down and ran his lips playfully along Cas, “Are you ok baby?”

Castiel loved the hunters soft caring tone. It made him feel loved. He cupped both sides of Deans face, “I’m more than ok Dean. I am very very happy right now. And I’m more in love with you”.

Dean kissed the inside of Castiels wrist, “I love you too honey. Now time to get cleaned up angel”. Dean laid one final kiss on the angels smiling lips before pulling out slowly. He managed to get them cleaned up and cuddling with Castiel being the little spoon. 

Castiel relished in the hunters warmth, “I love this”.

Dean kissed Castiels naked shoulder, “I love this too Cas. We are going to have many moments like this I promise angel”.

At that moment Castiels stomach grumbled making Dean bark a laugh. “Dean does sex make you hungry? Because I feel hungry”.

Dean responded, “Sometimes baby. Anyway let’s go get something in our bellies yeah?”

Castiel smiled, “I’d like that Dean”.

They shared a soft tender kiss before hunter and angel got going to feed their bellies.

* * *

**Back at the bunker...**

“Well Sammich, guess it’s time to pucker up”, Gabe added with a grin.

Sam was too happy right now. They had returned to the bunker and heard some very interesting sex noises coming from Deans room. Not to mention the trail of clothes on the floor and the moved furniture. It should be making him feel icky hearing his brother having sex but he felt relieved and happy instead. The angel and his brother deserved each other. He turned to Gabe and slid his arms around Gabes middle pulling the arch into him. He leaned in whispering onto Gabriel’s lips, “Ready for fireworks?”

Gabes heart skipped as he wrapped his arms around Sam’s neck, answering, “Hell yeah Sammich. Give me the whole works”.

Sam grinned before he planted a soft but searing kiss onto Gabes eager lips. The kiss was a sweet touch of lips that just tasted. Sam pulled his lips away, leaning his forehead against Gabes, “Well how was that?”

“Can we do that again?”.

Sam chuckled before whispering, “Yeah we can”. 

This time the lovers lips went in for a deeper kiss filled with tongue. _Oh how life was the sweetest of sweets right now._

TBC

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Thoughts?
> 
> Feedback...
> 
> Comments and kudos please...xoxo!


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Epilogue....

**Epilogue**

Dean and Castiel stumbled into the kitchen while struggling to stay upright as they engaged in playful kisses and tickles. Dean finally had managed to trap Cas against the island when a clearing of throat startled them.

Sam raised an amused brow at the boxer clad angel and brother, “Really guys?”

Dean smirked, “Heya Sammy”. Not the slightest embarrassed.

Sam knew his brother was just trying to be all cocky while the angel blushed hard. He folded his arms across his chest, “So y’all had a good night huh?”

“Yup!” Dean acknowledged while accentuating the ‘P’. 

“How was your night Sam?” Castiel asked.

Sam flushed lightly, “It was amazing Cas”.

Dean huffed, “Eh you’re talking as if he took you to an awesome island in the Caribbean”.

Sam grinned at his brother.

Deans eyes widened, “Wait he actually did that?”

“Oh don’t act so surprised Dean. My brother Gabe always has class”, Castiel added. 

“Wow!” Dean admitted. “Looks like he's a charmer. I’m officially impressed Sammy. He has my approval”.

Sam rolled his eyes, “Whatever Dean. I never needed your approval anyway”.

Dean sighed before walking over to the coffee pot. He proceeded to pour he and Castiel a cup each. He asked, “Sam need a cup?”

Sam got up, “Um no Dean. It’s fine. I gotta go get suited up now. Gabe and I are going to work a case together. We will be back by 6pm-ish”. He proceeded to walk towards the door.

“Woah, woah, woah!” Dean uttered. “No Sam”.

Sam rolled his eyes facing his flabbergasted brother, “Why not Dean?! You just said he had your approval!”

“Thats besides the point Sam! You are not going anywhere without me! I don’t trust anyone else apart from me and Cas to keep you safe. That’s final!”

Sam scowled, “Dean…..Gabriel is more than capable of taking care of me!”

“Answers still no!” Dean persisted.

Meanwhile, Castiel whom had been watching the exchange grew a little irritated at his lovers petulance. He declared, “Dean I think you should not be so hasty to doubt Gabe. I am positive he will keep Sam safe”.

Dean grit his teeth, “Cas I just can’t”.

Castiel countered, “Dean enough! Sam is not a child and he is an excellent hunter and Gabe is one hell of a powerful angel! Capisce!”

Dean pinched the bridge of his nose. He took a deep breath and uttered in a much more mellow tone, “Ok”. He glanced at his brother pointing out, “But you better call me if the hunt goes sideways okay!”

Sam smiled and nodded, “Ok Dean. We will”.

Dean licked his lips, contemplating a thought before he said, “And when you guys get back then tell Gabe to join us for dinner. I’ll be making my infamous pot roast and I’d like him to um…join us”. He glanced up to see Castiel beaming while Sam had a raised questioning brow. He blurted, “What?”

“Dean are you trying to invite Gabe for dinner just so you can give him the third degree?”

Dean rolled his eyes, “Sheesh ye man of little faith. No I am trying to accept him Sam since my brother really likes this angel. This is me giving him a chance”. He sighed, “And I promise I’ll be on my best behavior”.

The corner of Sam’s lips slowly uplifted, “Thanks Dean. I’m sure Gabe will be thrilled to come for dinner tonight”.

Dean returned Sams smile and watched his brother walk away. He was scared but at the same time he was more happy that his baby brother was happy. He purred happily when he felt Castiel slip an arm around his waist, plastering himself to Deans side. 

“That was nice of you Dean”, Castiel pecked his lover on his cheek.

Dean wrapped his arm around Castiels waist, pecking his lover on his lips, “I guess I have to give Gabe a chance. He did bring my brother back home in one piece and I am pretty sure he swept Sam off his feet with the whole private island date…so yeah”.

Castiel smiled fondly, “I think Gabe was very sweet. I’m happy for Sam and he. It’s about time we all have ourselves some happiness”.

Dean loved the glow in Castiels beautiful blue eyes when he uttered the last sentence. He thumbed at his lovers cheek, “So I was thinking that I take you out on an official proper date tomorrow. Would you like to go out on a date with me angel?”

Castiels heart surely skipped a beat and he was sure he was blushing and a little ecstatic when he replied, “I would love to go on an official date with you Dean”.

“Great hon”, Dean smiled toothily before he claimed Castiels lips in a deep bruising kiss.

“Mm Dean”, Castiel murmured as he pulled away lightly. He whispered on his lovers lips, “how about we take this to the bedroom?” He began to massage Deans hard bulge, “Wanna get this baby back in me”.

Dean grunted and mumbled huskily, “Christ Cas. You’ll be the death of me. Let’s go". Dean started to pull Castiel by his hand in the direction of the room but felt a tug. He turned to see his lover had stopped and was now pulling him back in. When he was plastered along Cas front, the angel thumbed at his lips before saying, “I love you Dean”.

Dean leaned his forehead against Cas, “I love you too baby. Thank you for busting in through the doors of the barn”. He smirked.

Castiel chuckled, “My pleasure lover”. He murmured, “Let makes love again Dean”.

“Your wish is my command angel”, With that Dean heaved a laughing Castiel bridal style into his arms.

_It was time to make up for lost time._

THE END.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I would like to thank all my wonderful readers for giving this fic a chance. You have been my inspiration with your lovely comments and kudos ♡.
> 
> Feedback...
> 
> Comments and kudos....xoxo!

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: Yes another Destiel Fic. Whenever a fresh idea pops into mind I put it down in writing. I have other fics and will pay equal attention to all :)
> 
> English is not my first language and this story has no beta. So all mistakes are my own. I apologize in advance.
> 
> Please I appreciate constructive feedback and kudos. It helps me know that you are enjoying the story.


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